wat bout pragnant strippers??
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Randomize
