Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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