Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
