he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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