I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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