I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
