I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
