Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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