Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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