Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Randomize