doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
