Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
