halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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