The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
