Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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