this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
