is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
