they said they heard you say put it in my butt
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize