when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize