life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
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