This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Michael Bay diarrhea
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
