It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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