five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
