But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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