Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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