Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Randomize