He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
