she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
