i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
