Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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