FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize