my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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