You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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