If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
