I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
