yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
