i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
