That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
