What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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