So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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