Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize