if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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