So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
I just cut my nipple shaving
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
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