Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
