Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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