it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
