What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize