carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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