what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
