Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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